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09-19-08, 09:47 AM   #44
A Deviate Faerie Dragon
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 13

I'm a raving altaholic. I actually discovered that Blizz limits an account to 50 characters across all servers by using all those slots and still wanting more. What have I learned from this?

First, I don't play women. My wife freaks out.

Second, I don't like paladins. I've tried to level paladins, and I always delete them around 15 or so. I've never been able to work up a druid very far either.

Third, I don't like elves. In order to enjoy a character, I have to connect with its inner dork. I have to like his /silly jokes, his /flirts, and his /dance. Night elves don't have an inner dork, and a blood elf's is mean. I can't do that kind of mean and nasty.

Gnomes are hysterically funny. If you never have, make a male gnome alt and type /train -- it makes me laugh every time. Dwarfs, too, are funny. They fit "Ale and whores!" trope that has been played for laughs ever since the original "Dungeons & Dragons" Boxed set. I can smile at the cheesy disco stylings of humans, the draeni's good natured delusions of adequacy, and the humor and sensibilities of every other race -- except the elves. Everything a blood elf says annoys or irritates me, and I just can't relate to the night elves. At all.

But the ones I've kept ....

Human protection warrior. I have this thing for self-sacrifice. Besides, I don't want mobs trying to beat up my wife's character. I've always been ready to step into the role nobody else wants to take. I picked human for the sword & mace bonus, and because my wife didn't like dwarves.

Gnome arcane mage. Arcane is a pretty cool way to level up. And bonus intellect is a clear advantage for a mage. Lots of fun.

Dwarf combat rogue. I suffered enormous revulsion when I learned the BE pally lore, so much so that I had to make an anti-BE pally to go and slay every BE priest & pally trainer in the game. There's nothing more anti-BE than a dwarf. And when you're a dwarf, there's no class more anti-Pally than rogue. Plus, there's all the fun of the whole "ale and whores" trope.

Orc affliction warlock. I figured he'd have more stamina than an undead, and the pet damage buff is nice. And the downtime for an affliction lock, properly played, is almost nil. Every so often, he'll hold a soul shard to his ear, smile, and say, "You can still hear the screaming...."

Troll assassination rogue. Stabbity stabbity stabbity stabbity!!! Doing it over, I'd probably pick an orc for the stun resistance and blood fury or an undead for cannibalism and Will of the Forsaken -- they all seem better for the PvP I like than Berzerking (esp with the changes to spell pushback coming in WotLK), but I can't give up my troll.

Tauren protection warrior. I have to have a prot warrior. And the bonus 5% to life is almost impossible for a tank to beat.

Forsaken arcane mage -- the horde equivalent to the gnome above. The Forsaken make fun of themselves in a sort of self-aggrandizing way that I enjoy.

Forsaken shadow priest. He doesn't get much play. But I do NOT relish the idea of starting over with his trade skills. And I'd rather play a priest as forsaken than troll.

Orc huntard, beastmaster. Also an engineer, so he can make his own ammo (which is often superior to what he can buy). He's there to reach 70 first and farm up cash for all the alts. Every racial an orc has contributes to a hunter; the same can't be said of trolls (alas).

Orc shaman, intended for enhancement. He just may wind up getting blown for a troll shammy, partly cuz trolls are so fun and I'd like another, and partly because I think I'd prefer an ele shammy to an enh in WotLK, and ele would be better suited to a troll, while enh is better as an orc.
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