A plea to the CarboTrolls...

[voodoodad]

As many... MANY people have noted, Carbonite has ceased to function after the 4.0.1 patch. This is to be expected, as this is the first patch leading to the release of Cataclysm, and almost everything about the game is changing.

Now, for the most part the response has been one of sadness and loss over a great addon and curiosity over whether the devs are working on a revamped version. There have also been 1 or 2 side trips into wierd paranoia-land stating things like "Blizz just don't wanna make players have no fun no more, so they brake teh gud addons". I'm not gonna address those.

What I am going to discuss are a small, but incredibly vocal subset of Carb users that I will hereafter refer to as CarboTrolls. Cute, huh? Made it up myself! Anyway, for a definition of CarboTroll, read on;

CarboTroll; noun, A World of Warcraft player who has been exposed to a heretofore unheard of virus known as Carbonite Madness. The symptoms of Carbonite Madness (or "the Carb Crazies" as it is euphemistically referred to at times) are as follows; The sufferer frequently posts virulent and sometimes outright threatening messages directed at the Carbonite development team, demanding that the addon be "FIXED NOW!".

Sufferers are also noted to totally lack any social skills whatsoever, arguing with people over the simplest of statements.

For example;

WoW Player: Ok, then. Have a nice day!

CarboTroll: GO F#@K URSLF!!!!

CarboTrolls have also been noted to have the strange inability to type anything without having the caps-lock on. This is a related virus known as Caplocitis. They also display a total inability to spell correctly, frequently replacing "your" or "you're" with the archaic "ur". "The" is almost universally transposed with "teh".

If you know of anyone displaying these symptoms, PLEASE attempt to get them help at once! Failing this, report them to the local authorities. Do NOT attempt to approach a sufferer of full blown Carb Madness by yourself! The only known way to deal with a sufferer of the full blown version of this virus is to destroy the brain of the sufferer. Unfortunately, by the final stages of the Carb Crazies, sufferers' brains will have shrunk to the size of a boiled pea, thus making them an almost impossible to hit target to anyone but the most highly trained marksmen.

If you are a sufferer of Carbonite Madness and you can still read this, there's STILL HOPE! Seek medical treatment immediately! While true that there is no cure for Carbonite Madness (other than a working version of the addon), there are several highly effective treatments that can bring the symptoms under control for long periods of time. Large glasses of Thorazine-laced Kool-Aid are among the best treatments the medical community have to offer, presently. Above all, do NOT post in these, or any other forums until after you receive help.

On a side note; Sufferers of Carbonite Madness have often been witnessed free-basing Gear Score. If you see a friend or loved one displaying this behavior, GET OUT OF THE HOUSE IMMEDIATELY! YOU ARE IN DANGER!